Kami is the contributing editor for Donor Eggs. She writes daily at The Other Side where she covers life with her new daughter, LB, the little butterfly.
A biography about someone dealing with infertility always seems to include at least two things: age(s) and treatment(s). For the unlucky, they also includes dates and ages of lost children. For the lucky, they will include dates when live children were born. I am now happy to call myself both unlucky and lucky. Before I get to the raw stats, I will give you a little more about myself – outside of infertility.
I am a bit of a geek and a little bit granola. I love to dance and bike. Those two activities and going for long walks nearly daily probably kept me out of a straight jacket during our trying to conceive years. I also enjoy reading – especially science fiction. My husband and I have joked that our Little Butterfly will need to learn to read by three months so we can all go to the local café and have a quiet evening together.
I should mention that we have a daughter whom we affectionately call Little Butterfly or LB for short. She was conceived after a dozen IUI's (one resulting in a miracle baby who also miraculously died shortly after birth), 4 failed fresh IVF cycles (two early miscarriages, one marginal chemical) and one successful donor egg cycle with a known donor.
Did we wait too long? Maybe, but more likely we waited to long to seek treatment. I was 34 when we first started trying to conceive. We waited a year and a half to learn that we had severe male factor infertility and were told IVF with ICSI was our only option. We did IUI instead and got lucky on our second IUI. After Ernest was born and died, we tried IUI's for another year thinking his conception a fluke. It was. By the time we moved to IVF with ICSI, I had just turned 38.
I am married to the love of my life, Brad. I think we have a wonderful partnership that has managed to survive and flourish even while dealing with loss and infertility. We are happily discovering how it feels to be parents after LB was born on June 20, 2008.