Monday, September 29, 2008


Yesterday I took my baby to his first AA meeting.

I realised, after much resistance to going, that I have only done about 3 meetings in five months. That is a looooooong time between drinks. Heh. I just felt so, so low. As my sister would say, the rats were doing the can-can in my head.

I sat in that room, where I first sat 10 years ago, and looked around. 12 guys, none of whom I knew, and me. Another woman came halfway through, which was nice. I remembered all of the people who had been to that meeting over the years ... it used to be my home group for a while. I wondered how they all were, how many were still sober. I marvelled that I am still sober. I sat there before the meeting started, idle chit-chat, how old was the baby, isn't the weather warm now. I planned on giving the MOTHER of all shares, because, you know, my problems are just so important right now.

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Topcat is one of the contributing editor for Alcohol and Drug Addiction. She writes daily at Indisputable Topcat where she is parenting after infertility and navigating her husband's cancer.

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