Stacie is the contributing editor for Prematurity. She writes regularly at her personal Heeeeere Storkey, Storkey, where she writes about her life, family, and most especially, her twin boys, Sh.awn and Ja.son, who were born at 28 weeks and 3 days due to PPROM.
For the longest time, my life was meticulously thought out. I am a planner and list maker by nature, so I knew exactly what I was going to do, how I was going to do it, and when it was going to happen. There were some minor surprises thrown in along the way, but for the most part, everything went as expected.
That is, of course, until we started trying to have a baby. Nothing went as planned from that point forward. But, three years, 3 IUI's, 3 IVF's, 2 miscarriages, a clotting disorder diagnosis, and twelve weeks of blood thinners later, I was finally pregnant with fraternal twin boys.
My pregnancy was less than stellar. It seemed like anything that could go wrong did. Starting my 20th week, due to a funneled, shortened cervix of 1.2 cm, I spent six weeks on complete bed rest at home, up only for bathroom visits, a shower every other day (oh, how I loved the freedom a shower brought), and my weekly doctor visits. Then at 26 weeks, the thing I feared most happened, and twin A's sack ruptured. I was hospitalized for the remainder of my pregnancy, delivering our boys by cesarean section at 28 weeks and 3 days.
Then all hell broke loose. My boys were born sick, apparently with an infection that ultimately affected me as well. Within hours of their birth, they both became gravely ill and nearly died. Brain bleeds, hydrocephalus, and surgeries became my life. Fear, stress, and adrenaline were my constant companions for the 104 long days the boys spent in the NICU.
While the trauma of the events surrounding their birth and early days are slowly fading from my daily thoughts, I continue to struggle with the fear of what lies ahead for my miracle babies.
Still, I have hope that my boys will live full and productive lives without any major issues. I pray that the hard times are behind us. And most importantly, I know that I am blessed. How could I not be with two beautiful 9 ½ month old boys?