Thursday, September 4, 2008

What Kind of Woman Does This?

When we first brought Tessa home, my grandma was quite disturbed in meeting Crystal, Tessa's firstmom.

Now, I love my Grandma, and she was an amazing woman. Almost 90 years old, she had seen space shuttles and the internet replace horse & buggies and telegrams.

But she was stuck in an absolutely incorrect view of birthmothers.

She was both grateful to Crystal for making me a mom, and contemptuous of her for "giving up her child." Indeed, most mothers -- by birth or adoption -- have trouble imagining the unimaginable. Grandma couldn't get over, "what kind of woman does this?"

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Lori is the contributing editor for Domestic Adoption. She writes daily at her main blog, Weebles Wobblog. She records her family's adoption story at Drama 2B Mama and reviews products at All Thumbs Reviews.


luna said...

I remember this post, lori, and I love that you shared it here on bridges. I think there's such misconception about birth parents, so many myths and stereotypes that need correction. I hope this analogy can help create a better understanding of the difficult act of relinquishment. thanks for sharing this here.

SeaStar said...

It is good to read from both sides about the connection between you and Crystal. Tessa is so beautfully loved. And I am thankful that you are both working to help future families on both sides of the adoption process. I was adopted fifty seven years ago into a loving family, and was fortunate to be told a bit of the story of my birth parents. Life has been good.