Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Another Baby Birthday

I can’t even count how many baby and children’s events I’ve had to decline or suffer through in the past few years. Baby showers, mother blessings, births, new baby visits, baby blessings, birthday parties. You know the joyful gatherings that infertile women tend to dread. (Of course this is on top of every other event that becomes child-centered when so many family and friends have kids, who are often the focus of attention.)

I can’t even tell you how many gifts I’ve had to buy for expectant mothers, babies and kids since we started trying. Too many. If I have to walk into another store with some clueless clerk asking me how far along I am, or how old my child is, or boy or girl, I might just fucking lose it. Plus it’s just too sad to keep wondering if I will ever need these things for myself one day…

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Luna is the contributing editor for Infertility. She writes daily at Life From Here: Musings from the Edge where she covers her infertility story from loss and IVF to her current journey through domestic adoption.

1 comment:

SeaStar said...

This is a hard and powerful post to read. I went back and read the whole original post and all the comments. and the particulars of my life have been different - no infertility but widowed young and the dificult invitations were to weddings, events where couples who had been our peers were all coupled up. I remember the challenge of wanting to celebrate with and for others and feeling my own loss anyway - and you pose well the challenge of choosing, at times at least, either isolation or painful participation. I think sometimes it’s just like that. Which doesn't make it easier.